SIGH. One month holiday flew away. Back to work again. Somehow, I'm feeling so unwilling to go, maybe it's because ive been slacking for too long, maybe its really because ot is not my interest. Maybe I won't be dragging myself to work when it comes to geron posting. Or maybe... Nursing is really not for me? I don't think i can be a good nurse. I went to pray twice, the first lot says choosing this career is a disaster, the second lot says, my dreams were untrue and it won't happen. My dream to help patients recover, it won't happen.. The reason why I'm staying on is because I love the patients, but so what? I'm bad at critical thinking, I'm bad at writing report. Im bad at answering the questions that people ask. I dont dare to scrub a patient cos im bad at communicating with doctors. Im too blur to be a nurse. Somehow, for a moment, I doubt my choice was right. Im afraid the stress and lack of freedom will cause me to lose my passion n interest, and then become a grumpy staff nurse. But what else can I do other than nursing? I hate ot, I hate myself for doubting my capabilities.



I don't know how, I don't know why, but u seem to be lingering on my mind all the time...
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