i punished myself by forcing myself to run 2 hrs in the stadium.
FOR
taking my strong immune system for granted
not being confident in my skills
not being proactive enough
being sleepy that i couldn't concentrate
not doing things that i should do
making family members worried
sayings real stupid things that hurts..

running is my way of releasing burdens without crying.
because i feel so breathless that i can't waste the breath to cry at all. all i need is to think, what am i good at ? i can't stop the run if there is no answer. i stopped eventually, but the answer is still nothing.
everyday is a battle between being negative and being positive, being confident and being uncertain.
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